5 min read

The Power of a High Five: How Gestures Boost Your Child's Motivation

As parents, we often wonder how we can encourage our children to maintain motivation and develop a positive attitude toward their tasks. You may have found yourself saying, "Good job!" or "You're so smart!" to boost their confidence. But have you ever considered the impact of non-verbal praise like high fives and thumbs up? Scientist have found that these simple gestures are even more powerful than verbal compliments and praise. Let's explore this fascinating study and learn how to harness the power of gestural praise to motivate our children.

‘’Tommy was beaming with pride as he presented his finger-painted masterpiece to his mom, Karen. Karen, a first-time parent, wanted to praise her son's effort, but she needed guidance on the right words to use. Instead of saying anything, she simply gave Tommy a high five. Little did Karen know, this simple gesture would significantly impact Tommy's motivation more than any words she could have said.’’

The Power of Praise: How Simple Encouragement Boosts Children's Motivation

A recent study conducted by Morris and Zentall (2014) explored the world of praise and its impact on children's motivation levels - and the results are both exciting and heartwarming! The researchers examined four different "flavors" of praise: verbal trait praise (e.g., "You're a good drawer"), verbal ambiguous praise (e.g., "Yea!"), gestural praise (like thumbs up or high five), and situations with no praise...

In this fascinating study, kids were observed as they tackled various tasks. The researchers then assessed their motivation and persistence, paying close attention to their enthusiasm to continue working and the effort they put into their tasks.

The findings revealed something delightful: children who received verbal ambiguous or gestural praise showed higher motivation and stuck with their tasks longer than those who got verbal trait praise or no praise. This means that more general praise or a simple thumbs up can work wonders in keeping kids engaged and eager to overcome challenges.

Interestingly, the study showed that verbal trait praise, often used by parents and teachers to praise children's abilities, didn't have the same positive effect on motivation as the other types of praise. This highlights how the choice of praise can make a real difference in a child's encouragement to face challenges head-on.

So, the next time you want to encourage a child, remember that a light-hearted "Yea!" or a fun high five can keep them motivated and happy while they learn and grow. Thanks to this insightful study by Morris and Zentall (2014), we know that choosing the right form of praise can make all the difference in helping children develop their motivation and persistence. The book "The High Five Habit " by @melrobbins is also greatly acknowledged for its valuable insights on how a simple gesture like a high five can inspire and motivate young individuals.

Why Gestures Matter

So, this fascinating study reveals that when it comes to praising our kids, we don't need to be overly specific or detailed. A simple "Yay!" or "Great job!" can work wonders for their motivation. Even better, gestures like a thumbs-up or a high five can significantly impact their feelings about themselves and their work.

You might be curious about why high fives are so powerful. When we give our little ones a high five, we make them feel good about their work and boost their self-esteem. High fives are often linked with outstanding performance, so when kids receive one, they may think they've achieved something exceptional!

Though the study doesn't delve into the intricacies of brain science, we can infer that when children receive praise, it triggers the release of feel-good chemicals like dopamine in their brains. This helps them feel happy, motivated, and eager to continue. So, when we praise our youngsters, we give their brains a little "happy boost" that keeps them going and feeling fantastic about themselves.

For instance, picture your child learning to ride a bike. They finally manage to pedal a short distance without falling. Instead of saying, "You're a natural at this!" (which is trait praise), you can exclaim, "Yay! You did it!" or give them a high five. This praise focuses on their effort and progress, making them feel good and motivated to keep trying, even if they stumble again.

So, let's remember to keep praise simple, fun, and positive for our kids. High fives, thumbs up, and encouraging words can go a long way in keeping them motivated and feeling fantastic about themselves. Happy praising!  

If you're interested in discovering a fun and simple way to trick your mind and boost your motivation, then you definitely need to check out Mel Robbins' book "The High Five Habit "! This book provides a comprehensive explanation on how you can use the power of a high five to perform better and achieve your goals. And the best part? You can even apply this method to help your child stay motivated and reach their full potential. So why wait? Start high-fiving your way to success today!

What does this mean for parents?

A simple high five can be the optimal form of praise for children. This gesture encourages persistence in the face of challenges and fosters positive feelings about their work and themselves. As seen in Karen and Tommy, the power of a high five goes beyond words, providing a meaningful and memorable connection between parent and child. This seemingly small act can impact a child's motivation and self-esteem, ultimately helping them develop a healthy, growth-oriented mindset. So, when you're unsure of the right words to praise your child, remember that a high five can go a long way in fostering their growth and happiness.

Tips for Parents

Now that we know the power of gestural praise, here are some tips for incorporating it into your parenting toolkit:

  • Make an effort to use gestural praise, like high fives and thumbs up, when your child accomplishes a task or demonstrates effort.
  • Be mindful of the verbal praise you use. Avoid trait-based compliments (e.g., "You're so smart") and instead focus on effort-based praise (e.g., "You worked hard on that").
  • Pay attention to the context in which you use gestures. Reserve high fives for truly exceptional achievements so your child associates them with a high level of accomplishment.

Remember, a simple high five can be an incredibly effective form of praise for your child. This gesture not only encourages persistence in the face of challenges but also nurtures positive feelings about their work and themselves. Parents should always bear in mind that their child appreciates and acknowledges when they know they did a good job. A small boost like this can significantly increase their confidence and trust in themselves, laying a solid foundation for their self-growth and development into better individuals.

Imagine that one day, your child becomes an adult, radiating with the self-confidence that you've instilled in them, unafraid to face the world head-on. Remember that non-verbal communication is crucial for building self-esteem and motivation. To foster a positive attitude towards learning and achievement, use a combination of verbal and gestural praise, such as high-fives and encouraging words, to support your child throughout their journey.

Take it from me, as I was one of those children who benefited from this approach. Thank you, Dad, for instilling my confidence through your support and encouragement.

References:

Morris, B. J., & Zentall, S. R. (2014). High fives motivate: The effects of gestural and ambiguous verbal praise on motivation. Frontiers in psychology, 5, 928.


Robbins, M. (2021). The High 5 Habit: Take Control of Your Life with One Simple Habit.

Frontiers | High fives motivate: the effects of gestural and ambiguous verbal praise on motivation (frontiersin.org)

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09DTFV5FH/ref=as_sl_pc_as_ss_li_til?tag=ottotheoctopu-20&linkCode=w00&linkId=cbfb3f195412de2bee036db1074b6809&creativeASIN=B09DTFV5FH