Parenting can be a challenge, especially when dealing with difficult child behavior like temper tantrums.

I remember the first time my daughter threw a full-blown tantrum in public. She was screaming and flailing around on the floor of the grocery store for what felt like an eternity. At that moment, I wanted to crawl under a rock and stay there forever! But I managed to stay calm through it all and eventually, she calmed down as well.

If you're struggling with how to handle your child's temper tantrums or other challenging behaviors, don't despair - there are steps you can take to remain calm even in the most trying moments.

Here are 10 proven tips that will help you stay calm when facing difficult child behavior:

1. Respectfully set a limit

Instead of raising your voice, try whispering or becoming totally silent. This can be an effective way to convey the message while calming the situation down. The key is to empathize with your child first and then state the limit: “I understand that it's hard for you to leave this fun game with those animals, but we have to go to the doctor now. Let's pick one animal to take along with us so that you won't feel sad". This approach will help your child better understand the situation while also making them feel connected and cared for.

2. Make up your mind to change

Reacting calmly to your child’s shenanigans is a huge challenge and it won't happen automatically. Any major parenting shift has to be intentional and mindful in order to be successful. Create a mantra that works for you, something like “I will be compassionate” or “I am here to help them learn.” When things get tough, focus on your mantra and remind yourself of why you are doing this – because you love your child. This will help keep you on track as you strive to stay calm and react thoughtfully.

3. Find the best moment to teach

It’s important to teach your child lessons when they are in a calm and receptive mindset. A good time for teaching is after a situation has diffused, or even later in the day. When you have their attention, start off by reminding them about what happened: “Earlier today something didn't go quite as planned. How can we work together to ensure it goes better next time?” Have an open dialogue with your child and use this opportunity to talk through the issue at hand, encouraging them to come up with solutions that will benefit both of you. This will help foster problem-solving skills while also teaching them how to take responsibility for their actions and become more self-aware.

4. Take a moment and breathe

Losing your cool can be difficult to manage, but there are ways to regain composure. Practice “stop, drop, and breathe”: take a deep breath from your belly and allow yourself to relax at the moment. Not only is this a great tool for adults, but it can also be used with children! Remind your body that the situation isn't an emergency through mindful breathing – you'll be back in control of your emotions before you know it.

5. Look after yourself

When it comes to calming down in the face of negative child behavior, don't forget to take care of yourself first! Eating balanced meals and snacks throughout the day, getting enough restful sleep, and carving out time for yourself are all essential components. If you're feeling overwhelmed or overworked, there's no shame in asking your partner or a nanny/sitter for help - this is an effective way to recharge and restore balance. Showing self-compassion will allow you to have the energy necessary to stay calm during challenging moments with your children. It's also important to return the favor when you can!

6. Get some solitude

If you find yourself growing frustrated with your child's misbehavior, take a few moments to get your emotions under control. That may mean walking away from the situation for a minute or stepping out of the room altogether (assuming your child is over 5). Take some deep breaths, or visualize an image of them in happier times—like when they were enjoying ice cream so much that it was dripping off their chin and they offered you a taste. Doing this can help you regain your composure and respond to their misbehavior in a more effective way.

7. Find fun in it

When your child refuses to change out of their pajamas and creates an unexpected watermelon mess, it can be difficult not to burst into tears or become overwhelmed. However, try to find humor at the moment instead! Find a way to laugh at some of the silliness of the situation or even your own mistakes as a parent. Not only will this make life more enjoyable, but it can also help reduce your stress levels.

8. Unwind with your little ones

Show your kids how to effectively manage stress in a fun and easy way with activities such as laying in the hammock, exploring the garden, taking a walk during lunch, or stretching in the evenings. By engaging in these activities with them, you can model good stress management habits that they can take with them throughout life.

9. Stop worrying and focus on the good

It is natural to feel concerned about your child's well-being and decisions. However, worrying too much can be harmful to both you and your child - it can make them even more anxious about the situation. But how do you stop yourself from worrying? It may be easy to succumb to fear-filled thoughts but it's essential to remember that doing so will only lead down a path of distress. Instead, focus on positivity and try to envision brighter outcomes. Doing this will help form neural pathways in your brain which are more conducive to positive thinking, ultimately leading to less worry.

10. Transform the way you look at things

It's only natural to feel angry at our children's behavior sometimes, but we should remember that they are only acting their age. While appropriate consequences must be enforced, it is important to keep in mind that this is not a personal attack on us as parents. Rather, it reflects our own levels of patience and tolerance. So next time your child swears at you, take a breath to remain calm and guide him through the process of making amends—all while remembering he's still just a kid.

Sometimes, it’s hard to remember that children don't always know how to express themselves. It's important to recognize that the child may be struggling with something deeper than just a temper tantrum. If you are finding yourself feeling overwhelmed and frazzled when facing difficult child behavior, reach out for help. Join our community who understand what it is like to have challenging behavior in their homes by joining our mailing list or follow us on social media here https://linktr.ee/ottotheoctopus.

We hope that these 10 ways will provide you with some tools to stay calm while facing difficult child behavior and give you the confidence that comes from knowing you can handle whatever comes your way